The Danger of Labeling Situations

Holistic law practice springs from the premise that legal “problems” frequently provide opportunities for transformational growth.  Most of us value stability and security to the point at which we will resist change unless and until pain – be it psychological or physiological – reaches a certain threshold.  Until we reach that threshold, we may tolerate myriad life situations that fall far short or providing inner peace and happiness, instead opting to perpetuate the familiar.

Then we experience some type of loss, threat to the familiar, or an experience at odds with how we have come to think life “should” or “should not” be.  Such experiences can precipitate fear about the unfolding of future events, and upset to our routines, level of financial security, etc.  This fear may even bring about physiological changes, release of stress hormones, etc., that most of us would interpret as “unpleasant.”

These challenges, however, are compounded when we judge the event or series of events as “bad.”  Construing events in such a way may then fuel a belief that people, or life in general, is/are “unfair.”  In reality, however, these events often provide impetus for transformational change that can significantly deepen one’s happiness and inner peace.

When we label these situations as “bad,” we are essentially freezing life in time.  The  fact is that life will continue to unfold.  The key is how we respond to these particular conditions or circumstances.  Our responses will largely dictate how we look back on these situations in a month, year, five years, etc.  If we latch on to our original temporal assessment that a situation is “bad,” we may also slip into a mindset of helplessness that may choke off any adaptive response to the situation.

Holistic law practice works to help clients deal with legal situations in less reactive and judgmental ways, opening the potential for more adaptive response.  Holistic law counseling helps clients move beyond these conditioned reactions that can lead to feelings of helplessness, and toward far wider possibilities for embracing optimal solutions for all involved in a given conflict.

For more information on holistic law practice, visit https://lawyertherapist.com, or call Holistic Lawyer and Psychotherapist Michael Lubofsky at (415) 508-6263.

Holistic Law and the Emphasis on One’s Relation to Experience

Traditional law practice overlooks unique opportunities for clients to truly improve their lives and the lives of those around them.  The narrow focus of traditional law practice fixates on objective facts to the virtual exclusion of ways in which the parties, and others impacted by conflict, relate to those facts.  The ways in which we relate to our unfolding life experience are largely a function of learned conditioning – the result of accumulated past experience – together with genetic predispositions.

Typically, when a client comes to an attorney for advice, they do so because of some real or perceived loss or threat of loss in their life.  This loss may be economic, physical, or ego-related such as feared loss of community standing or identity.  The reality is that an objective fact or set of facts have arisen in the world of which the client has some awareness.  What will widely differ among individuals is the layer or multitude of layers of meaning that he or she will (usually unconsciously) impose on these factual events or scenarios.  These predispositions, to the extent they remain unconscious, largely dictate the ways in which we relate to life experience.

Because legal conflict so often gives rise to these layers of unconscious relation to experience, it presents an ideal opportunity to explore a client’s conditioning and habitual ways of relating to experience.  The failure to explore these tendencies at particularly challenging times is likely to result in these tendencies becoming increasingly solidified in the client’s life.  Because traditional law practice largely ignores these underlying dynamics, clients far more often than not look back on their “legal problems”  with disdain, representing just one in a long series of frustrations resulting from their habitual relation to experience in more or less unconscious ways.

Holistic law practice stresses the transformative potential in conflict.  The holistic lawyer acknowledges and explores with the client his or her ways of relating to past and present experience that may have brought about or exacerbated the “legal problem.”  Often, when these previously unconscious orientations are explored, clients become able to let go of these tendencies and see more clearly the nature of what has happened and what is happening, and deal with it in a far more compassionate and less reactive manner.  More importantly, the client comes to realize that his or her future behavior need not be dictated by conditioned thinking and habitual reactions.

To learn more about holistic law practice, contact Licensed Psychotherapist and Attorney Michael Lubofsky by calling (415) 508-6263 or by visiting https://therapyforlawyers.com.

Moving Beyond Divisiveness

In the current U.S. election, Donald J. Trump has campaigned on the slogan “Make America Great Again.”  The policies espoused by Mr. Trump as a roadmap to this “greatness” largely pit one faction against another, implying that his vision of “greatness” is necessarily dependent on the exclusion of others from this vision.

In addition, Mr. Trump has projected an immorality largely oblivious to the rule of law.  For example, when questioned on business practices that may have allowed him to avoid the payment of personal income taxes, perhaps for decades, he blames loopholes in the system, as if the system should be a dictator and enforcer of morality.

Stepping back from the candidates, however, what can become apparent is the energy with which a majority of the U.S. population is rejecting Mr. Trump’s underlying message.  The goal of this message appears to be to instill fear in as many people as possible as a means of garnering support for his divisive plans.

When we are in fear, our world becomes small, and our vision narrow.  We are triggered to acquire and even hoard what we can, even at the expense of others.

But we are on the cusp of a new consciousness that recognizes the importance of letting go of fear as a necessary precursor to building a sustainable, healthy society.  As a result of heightened mindfulness, increasing numbers of people are becoming experientially attuned to the reality that fear-driven behavior usually precipitates a downward spiral that destroys relationships, societies, and even life itself.

This fear-driven dynamic is also perpetuated by adversarial litigation.  When enmeshed in narrow fears, litigants clutch for whatever award they might realize.  This myopia operates largely to the exclusion of the interests of a much more broad circle of stakeholders.  Any decision made or action taken on such a basis is likely to be far less than optimal and actually harm relationships and society as a whole.

Holistic law practice, by rejecting the underlying notion of divisiveness inherent in adversarial litigation, is moving in step with our heightened societal mindfulness that has fueled much of the opposition to Mr. Trump’s divisive messages.

To learn more about how holistic law practice can help identify optimal solutions to conflict, please contact Psychotherapist and Attorney Michael Lubofsky at https://lawyertherapist.com, or by calling (415) 508-6263.

Mindfulness: Beyond Stress Relief and Towards a Better World

Like most people who find their way to mindfulness practice, I did so many years ago in efforts to find more sustainable solutions to dealing with stress as a driven, young attorney in my late twenties.  In what was an early incarnation of what is now called mindfulness-based stress reduction, or MBSR, I did find that by becoming more mindful of my breath, I could slow down my heart rate.  The ability to do this seemed to give me a sense of relief that, up until that time, I may have thought would have only been available from solutions existing outside of myself in the form of food, drink, other people, etc.

I had no awareness or knowledge at that time of any sort of template for living in a way that could potentially transform that sense of relief into deep, sustainable inner peace.  Even if such a template had been presented to me at that time, I would have thought it to be so contrary to my priorities that it would have been quickly dismissed.

For years, actually decades, I continued to practice meditation almost solely for the physiological relief it afforded me from the typical stressors of contemporary American life.  For a good deal of this time, however, I pretty much continued thinking and acting consistent with conditioning I had internalized through my formative years.  This conditioning, I can now appreciate in retrospect, had forged a strong egoic identity that was largely impermeable to the notion that I might look upon life in fundamentally different ways.

But as will often happen as we get older, life has ways of humbling just about everyone.  Over time, we amass wisdom of experience that may, at some point, serve to penetrate the ego and open us to new ways of thinking and being in the world.  Once this door is opened, we can begin trying new ways of orienting towards life experience.  We can begin to let go of maladaptive strategies and behaviors.  We can walk out into life with an open sense of wonder and begin to experiment with new ways of being that would have previously been too threatening to the ego.

At this point, through trial and error, as well as with the benefit of wisdom from others who have walked this path over millennia, we can come to identify specific ways of being and acting in the world that actually deepen our inner peace for beyond stress relief.  What is most amazing, though, is finding that those ways of being and behaving that most foster inner peace are actually those ways of being and behaving that help others, make the world more compassionate, promote health and well-being, reduce waste, promote sustainability, constructively resolve conflict, etc.

Even as an experienced practitioner, however, I encounter times when my conditioning, together with societal norms, cause me to question the purpose or value of sustaining a spiritual practice beyond “stress reduction.”  After all, much of what is required is contrary to behaviors that are “valued” in contemporary American society.

The answer to this question, though, I have come to view as the ultimate win/win scenario.  What I have found is that the behaviors and ways of being in the world that help others and actually treat the world in a far more sustainable way are actually the behaviors that provide me with inner peace and clarity.  When venturing out into the world with this foundation, life becomes far more interesting as behavior is not driven and limited by egoic notions of how life “should” be.

To learn more about the benefits of mindfulness practice, especially as applied to legal disputes and conflict resolution, please contact Licensed Psychotherapist and Attorney Michael Lubofsky at (415) 508-6263, or visit https://www.lawyertherapist.com.

The Importance of Compassion in Effective Dispute Resolution

An increasing number of studies point towards the integral role that compassion and empathy for others plays in cultivating happiness and well-being. Compassion arises from a felt connection to all of life in the present moment. Compassion lies beyond thoughts and preconceived notions about a person or a given situation.

The typical adversarial approach to conflict resolution that pervades contemporary civil justice in America is rarely effective in cultivating compassion and/or empathy. Instead, one’s thought-driven notions of how things should be most often form the basis of an attorney’s litigation strategy.

Such a failure to elicit compassion and empathy can explain why, far more often than not, legal or “courtroom” victories ring hollow for a prevailing party soon after a fleeting sense of ego gratification dissipates.

In contrast to this prevailing adversarial model, holistic law practice has as a primary objective the cultivation of compassion and empathy prior to the development and implementation of a concrete legal strategy. A fundamental precept inherent in the holistic approach is that optimal, lasting solutions to interpersonal conflict arise from beyond ego, thought, and preconceived notions.

To learn more about holistic law practice, contact Licensed Attorney and Psychotherapist Mike Lubofsky at (415) 508-6263, or visit https://lawyertherapist.com.

Rethinking The Role of Attorneys in Society

For centuries, the function of attorneys in American society has been primarily defined by an ethical obligation to zealously represent clients within proscribed evidentiary and procedural guidelines aimed at eliciting “truth” and, ultimately, some ephemeral notion of “justice.” The more broad notion that attorneys should work towards the overall betterment of society has been subordinated to the ethical obligation to advance the interests of individual clients.

The more broad role in moving society forward in more sustainable directions refers not simply to offering inexpensive legal services to the financially underprivileged, but rather to working to address fundamentally flawed orientations to life that contribute to an overwhelming percentage of legal conflicts and criminal behavior.

Most attorneys may read about serving the more holistic needs of clients and respond that such issues fall within the purview of psychologists, clergy, or spiritual counselors. A law practice that emphasizes mindful awareness of present-moment experience, however, is uniquely positioned to offer fundamental, lasting changes to clients in the context of resolving problematic real-life situations, whereas the work of psychologists and spiritual counselors is often conducted in a more abstract, experiential vacuum.

The historically fundamental failure of attorneys to help move society forward and truly help resolve problematic behavior has become patently obvious to society at large. Our system is broken largely as a result of our flawed definition of the role of attorneys as usually little more than “advocates” in a fundamentally misguided “adversarial system” of justice. The term “justice” in itself, embraces a dualistic concept of “right” and “wrong” that serves to drive society in more polarized directions, doing little to promote healing and more desirable, sustainable outcomes.

In time, society will either embrace a more mindful approach towards conflict resolution, or continue to fracture by individual motives driven by self-interest. If attorneys can come to redefine their roles, however, as agents of a fundamental shift towards heightening mindful awareness of present-moment experience in the face of some of life’s most challenging situations, attorneys may begin to truly help move society in more positive, sustainable directions.

To learn more about incorporating mindfulness in law practice, contact Licensed Therapist and Attorney Michael Lubofsky at (415) 508-6263, or visit https://therapyforlawyers.com. We also offer professional coaching to attorneys interested in incorporating mindfulness into their individual practices.

Mindfulness in Law Practice

The mindful law practice emphasizes the unique core of each individual client that lies beyond his or her “problematic” legal issues. In cultivating mindful attention on present-moment experience, clients come to face concerns which are typically future-focused, often manifesting themselves in the emotion of fear. This clash between present-moment awareness and projected future concerns, however, can also serve as fertile ground in which to plant the seeds of inner peace.

My holistic practice tends to work simultaneously on two planes: (1) the practical plane emphasizing real-life legal solutions; and (2) the “spiritual” plane which aims to heighten one’s mindfulness and dis-identification from learned conditioning in a way that can facilitate inner peace. Improved mindful attention to the present moment will often lead to otherwise overlooked creative legal solutions as well as a reduced likelihood that clients will repeat decisions, behaviors, and reactions that may have contributed in no small way to the client’s current legal difficulties.

In my initial meeting with a client, there is a focus on understanding his or her current legal situation to ensure that timely actions are taken to preserve and defend the client’s legal rights and/or defenses. A blueprint for addressing the client’s legal issues is laid out so that the client can begin to let go of some of the fear that he or she has come to associate with current legal difficulties. Ideally, from this point forward, meetings become more oriented towards the cultivation of mindfulness. Less time in future sessions is devoted to he practical solution-oriented aspects of representation – the tenor shifts more from attorney to counselor.

As an example, a client facing a divorce involving children may, through our mindfulness sessions, come to identify certain entrenched thoughts which, upon closer examination, are directly contributing to strong “fears” that their legal situation may cause them to “lose everything,” e.g., identity as a spouse, a parent, etc. These fears may be causing the client to react in ways that are actually exacerbating the client’s situation, e.g., “clingy” or obsessive behavior, manipulation of children so as to win their approval vis a vis the other spouse, etc.

Through our mindfulness sessions, however, a client can begin to internalize the notion that he or she need not be defined by his or her thoughts. The client begins to cultivate an ability to connect with a more grounded sense of being that lies beyond his or her conditioned thinking, and beyond the prior importance the client had put on his or her status as this or that. In becoming more present focused, negative thoughts associated with formerly projected negative future outcomes begin to dissipate. The client comes to realize a whole new way of approaching life. The client’s previously destructive behaviors begin to cease.

In this way, the integration of mindfulness in law practice can serve as a unique springboard for truly improving the lives of clients, and society as a whole. To learn more about mindfulness in law practice, visit https://lawyertherapist.com, or call Attorney and Psychotherapist Michael Lubofsk, at (415) 508-6263.

A Return to Here and Now

The period between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day can prove particularly challenging for mindfulness practice. Commercial and societal messages of things we should have or want, the way our lives should be, etc., confront us at every turn and through all forms of media. We may feel especially hijacked by thoughts of what we think is or was expected of us by those closest to us now, or those closest to us in the distant past. It is not difficult to imagine how the pull of such expectations can work to extricate us from the present moment and into an unconscious, thought-driven mode emphasizing idealized notions of how things should be.

With the holiday season now behind us, we can begin to settle back into our more familiar routines in an environment somewhat less charged with embedded messages of things we should buy or how our lives should be in some Rockwellian sense. Freed from such learned conditioning and expectations, many may find it easier to reconnect to present moment experience and resume a more mindful approach to daily life.

In the context of dealing with legal problems which may have been avoided or left pending during the holiday season, now may be an opportune time for re-grounding in a mindful sense of being that is far more conducive to identifying optimal solutions to these challenges. My holistic approach to law practice can help reestablish a fundamental connection to present-moment experience and, in the process, facilitate identification of how to best approach the most vexing issues in your life.

If you are facing a legal issue and are trying to identify how to best proceed, contact Licensed Attorney and California Psychotherapist Michael Lubofsky at (415) 508-6263, or visit website at https://lawyertherapist.com.

Attorney Satisfaction Now Highly Dependent on Non-Monetary Factors

In addition to my law practice, I have provided consulting services to law firms for over fifteen years. Often, especially when dealing with partners who have been practicing for more than twenty years, a complaint commonly expressed is that associates (and employees in general) fail to take initiative to cultivate new business for the firm. This is often expressed as a shortcoming or sense of entitlement of younger generations.

In addition to the reality that the legal profession is now far more competitive for young attorneys, law practice today is substantively far more complex than it was twenty years ago. But perhaps this gap between older and younger attorneys represents a more fundamental shift in priorities among generations – a shift emphasizing greater inner peace and relegating material wealth as an end in itself to subordinate importance.

If this is true, then in order to retain talented associates, law firms must begin to devote more time and attention to more spiritual needs of their employees. More progressive companies such as Google are now incorporating mindfulness training into the daily work lives of its employees. Google realizes that emotional intelligence – cultivated through mindful awareness of present-moment experience – is at least as important, if not more so, than the intellectual capacity of its employees.

By emphasizing mindfulness, holistic law practice begins to shift the focus of attorneys toward the more foundational needs of clients as well as other attorneys. To learn more about how holistic law practice can help you, visit https://therapyforlawyers.com, or contact Psychotherapist and  Lawyer Michael Lubofsky at (415) 508-6263.

Making Work Work

Whether one is a small business owner, entrepreneur, or employee, the search for a truly satisfying work life can seem constantly elusive. From a holistic perspective, this challenge can result from one or both of the following factors: (1) the goal of your enterprise or organization, or company for whom you work, is fundamentally at odds with a grounded sense of interconnectedness with being that we all share; an/or (2) the ways in which you are going about or performing your work are lacking in consciousness or present-moment awareness.

The unhappiness of people enmeshed in the above-described scenarios day after day permeates contemporary American society and is manifested in myriad health problems, substance abuse and other addictions, and lost productivity. In the context of legal problems, people in unhappy work situations are more prone to disputes with their employers, problems in their relationships, and financial difficulties.

For business owners, entrepreneurs, or others with ultimate enterprise control, the key is to cultivate a high degree of mindful attention to the present moment when contemplating the organizational mission. In developing mindfulness, one can come to dis-identify from conditioned, mind and ego-driven thoughts about what external factors can bring about “happiness” (e.g., personal wealth, power, control, etc.), and begin to connect with a more fundamental, innate sense that what one is doing is connected to the wider, all-inclusive concept of life in some meaningful way.

For employees who lack control over the mission of their employer, this exercise can become more challenging. It is becoming increasingly common, especially in this recessional economy, for workers to be interminably stuck in positions with misguided employers ou of sheer financial necessity. The lives of such workers, however, can be significantly improved by cultivating a more mindful approach to daily life. In this way, the how someone is doing a particular job is more important than what that person is doing. One who is tying his or her shoe with a high degree of mindfulness can realize far more inner peace than someone driving a Lamborghini on a freeway while talking on a cell phone.

My holistic law practice works with clients to not only solve their legal problems, but to also cultivate mindful awareness in a way that can improve their lives long after their legal issues have been resolved. To learn more about holistic law, call Licensed Attorney and Psychotherapist Michael Lubofsky at (415) 508-6263, or visit https://lawyertherapist.com.